Kung Fu Mario

I’m not the biggest fan of the portly plumber and his never-ending problems with Bowser kidnapping Princess Peach. Maybe, according to this video, I just needed some context.

To be honest, if Mario had some combat mechanics, I’d be more inclined to give it a go…

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Assassin’s Creed III’s revolution trumps the Boston Teaparty?

I’ve seen some pretty bold claims made in the name of gaming. Rock Band 3 proclaimed it could create musicians. Def Jam Rapstar proclaimed it could turn nerds in bona fide MCs. And now, Assassin’s Creed III would have you believe that its fictional war between the Templars and Assassins mattered more than the American Revolution!

There you have it! The revolution that threw off the shackles of the oppressive British Empire pales into insignificance next to the antics of a hooded wetboy hacking up redcoats, tiptoeing across rooftops and having chats in candlelit rooms with wig-wearing blokes.
This ups the dramatic stakes of the AC franchise immensely because AC: III’s story has some lofty heights to reach. Stay tuned!

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World Of Warcraft Mists Of Pandaria launch snaps

World Of Warcraft Mists of Pandaria launch

Cafe De Paris gets the Pandarian treatment

Last night Blizzard launched the new World Of Warcraft expansion pack and they were kind enough to invite me down to eat their food, drink their booze and generally make a nuisance of myself with my camera phone! Continue reading

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Mario the axe-murdering swine

I’m buried under a ton of work today so I just have time for this quick post in which Mario is revealed to be an axe-murdering psychopath.

Mind you, everyone who has ever played Mario has wanted to respond to Toad’s glib “sorry Mario, but the princess is in another castle” pronouncement in just the way Mario does in that video. Oh, and checkout Dorkly‘s channel. It’s rather good!

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Double Dragon’s skeleton key: The Elbow

Double Dragon Neon

Yeah, you got some fancy footwork there, bro, but have you got THE ELBOW!!?

I downloaded the demo for Double Dragon Neon the other night. For the first 10 or so minutes of fiddling about with it, I was utterly seduced by it. I loved the current gen upgrade to the original layouts and was genuinely tickled to see that  – barring some of the more overt S&M sound bytes proffered by the game’s under-dressed whip wielding femme fatales – the game’s aesthetic hadn’t really moved on from Walter Hill’s 1979 gang flick, The Warriors. However, after about half an hour I found myself stymied by the fact that the game’s move list didn’t include The Elbow. Continue reading

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Borderlands 2 Bag O’ Swag

Borderlands 2 Bag O Swag

Mr Postman delivered a box to me today. Whatever could it be?

Happy Borderlands 2 day, fellow Vault Hunters! What’s that? You don’t care for Borderlands 2? You don’t even know what a Vault Hunter is? Then go away, because you certainly won’t be interested in feasting your eyes on the whacking great bag o’ swag that 2K sent me through the post! Continue reading

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Grimlock smash iPhone 5

Yeah, yeah, there’s a phone being launched in San Francisco today, and yeah, yeah, it’s popular enough for me to totally gank on its link-bait popularity. But will I bother to watch the actual unveiling of said iPhone? Well, yes, but only because I’m reporting on it. Will I then begin scrimping and saving for one of these handsets? No! Because I will be saving instead for this:

You have your iPhone. I have the ability to transform into a T-Rex. So there!

Oh, and seriously, if you haven’t picked a copy of this game yet, please do so! It’s an awesome game and you shouldn’t let the fact it’s published by Activision put you off it – if, indeed, that’s the reason you haven’t bought it yet!

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